Written by Mathew Rodriguez
Going home for the holidays often means more than just good food and family time — it can mean being undeniably horny and just wanting to get out of the house and get some. Whether you’re looking to get your stocking stuffed or slide down someone’s chimney, Sniffies map-based interface makes it easier than ever to get the present you want the most. To help you get off when you go home, we’ve compiled a list of tips that can help make sure you get to be the ho ho ho of your holiday dreams.
Are your profiles updated?
Yes → You’re holiday hookup ready!
No → Update your Sniffies profile before you go home. Updating your profile will let fellow cum-and-goers know that you’re ready to pounce and whether you can host or not. And while you’re at it, update your photo.
Will you have enough time to set up a hookup while you’re there?
No → You can always find someone in advance. An upgraded Sniffies account allows you to access Travel Mode to change your location and find someone before your plane even takes off.
Dealing with lots of questions?
Yes → Have a story ready. Keep it simple, you’re not Virginia Woolf. The lie doesn’t need to be impressive, just functional: you’re meeting a high school friend for drinks, or something to that effect.
Do you have a place to hook up?
Yes → Either you are hosting or traveling.
No → There are more hookup options locally than you might think. Check out the Sniffies map to see local cruising spots, groups and gloryholes near you. And make sure to check Sniffies’ Cruising Update, where anyone within a couple miles of you might be putting out a call for the dick or hole they need. Just make sure when you do meet up in public it’s somewhere you can access safely.
Is leaving home proving to be really hard?
Yes → If leaving home is hard, try Sniffies’ LivePlay for some steamy video chats. We know this one sounds hard, given that this one requires you being sexy while your loved ones may be nearby. But, if leaving the house is really not in the cards and you’re OK with having an intimate connection without a physical one, you can always have video-based fun (something you might remember from the early days of COVID.) Just make sure to triple-lock the door and maybe put on a television in another room to make sure noise isn’t an issue. You’d be surprised how sexy you can get in a completely hushed voice.
Did you forget to bring lube/ PrEP/ condoms?
If not, ask your partner to borrow some to get you through this common packing mistake.
Do you have a place to get ready?
Yes → If you have a place to douche, then you’re already winning. Now, you can kill two birds with one stone: bring a reusable bulb so you can save the planet and avoid leaving a paper — or plastic — trail.
No → If not, be honest with your partner and ask if you can douche in their bathroom. Believe me; people are more understanding than you think.
Do you smell like sex?
Yes → Take a shower before heading home or, if you happen to smell like a bathhouse, tell your family that you took a dip in a friend’s hot tub.
The more D, the merrier, cruisers! Hope our guide makes it a holiday to remember.
xx,
Sniffies
